Friday, June 23, 2017

Silver and Gold


There is an old scout song that starts out "Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver, the other is gold."  Like most women, I need good friends. The kind you can laugh with, cry with, eat chocolate with, drink wine with...the kind who know a lot about you and love you, anyway. And I need some of those friends to be where I am, physically. I have platinum-level friends that have known me practically my whole life, and I know I can call on them when I need to. But having a circle of friends - a tribe - that can actually come over or go to dinner or just pass by on a daily basis. That's what I require. 

A common exclamation around this time of year is "I don't know how you do it! It's so hard to move!" And I always remark that I'm a collector of friends. It's not easy to move, sure. It's hard to leave people that I've built relationships with. However, it makes my heart glad to know that I can travel practically anywhere in the United States, and in a lot of overseas locations, and I have a friend there. It's pretty cool to think about it that way! 

When we moved here to Arlington about 3.5 years ago, I remember being really optimistic about meeting new people. But after about six months, I just didn't feel like I was developing any real relationships at all. I was disappointed. Even a year in, I felt like I had some friendships, but they were rather superficial. But somewhere along the way, those seeds took root and grew in to oaks, and it is once-again hard to leave. At the start of this school year, I invited a few neighborhood moms/friends to come have coffee at my house on Friday mornings after we dropped the kids at school. It was the highlight of my week. Sometimes we prayed, sometimes we cried, sometimes we celebrated a birthday, sometimes we grieved a loss, most often times we laughed, and every time we loved. We watched a baby grow thru her first year. It was never anything fancy, and it was never forced. Come if you can, come as you are, and just be with people who love you. It was such a joy to have my dining room full of women I love every Friday morning. 

Today is the last day of school. Ranger and I walked the kids to Ashlawn one last time. When I got home, I was suddenly overcome with sadness, and I couldn't quite put my finger on why. It's been an emotional week of goodbyes and "lasts". Then it hit me. It was Friday morning, and my tribe wasn't here. My table was gone. My dining room was empty. My house was quiet. It wasn't the way I loved it at all. And it made me sad. But then I remembered how I felt that first year - as though I just wasn't going to be able to make any friends here. And reflecting on that now, as I hold these new friendships close, brings me hope and joy. Sometimes friendships, like wine, just have to age a little before they're really good. And now, as we leave here and head to a new area, I'll take these now "gold" friendships with me. And I'll look for some "silver" ones to add to my collection.

Thanks for the memories, Arlington, VA.


Last Day of School



After AJ's 5th Grade Promotion