Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Gone...er...Fishing?

A few weeks ago, Alan decided it would be fun to take the kids fishing.  He tends to have fantastically optimistic visions of our children's behavior.  It's cute.  So, we're going fishing.

Step 1: We're going to need a few new fishing rods.  So we head to the nearest Walmart (which, thank God, is about 25 minutes away).  I had read that a new one opened nearby so we headed over there.  It looked like this:

 
I call it the "Big City Walmart".  It's in a multi-level building, next to a 24-hr fitness and a larger office building.  When we pulled up, the parking lot had a gate and Alan was all, "Oh, hell no!  We better not have to pay to park at Walmart!"  We did not have to pay, but we were the only pickup truck in the parking lot and we had to take up two spots.  I'm pretty sure they're breaking some sort of "Walmart Law" that says all their parking lots must easily accommodate pickup trucks.  Walmart is Walmart, after all.  Can't put lipstick on that pig.  Anyway, we chose some adequately-priced-for-kids fishing rods and headed out. 
 
Step 2: We are going to need some worms.  A few weeks prior, we had planted some seeds in a flower bed and noticed tons of nice, fat worms, so we head home and put the kids to work digging up worms:
 
 
Step 3: Go to Dick's to buy worms:
 
Step 4: Find the perfect spot:
 
 
Step 5: Find a different perfect spot than the one we had in mind:
 
Step 6: Bait the hooks and cast!
 
 
Step 7: Fix the cheap-ass reel from the stupid big-city Walmart and re-cast:
 

 
Step 8: Wait for the fish to bite:


 


 
 
Step 9: Cut the hook out of the tree:
 
Step 10: Give the kids a break and a snack.  They've been fishing a whole 1/6 hour.

 
Step 11: Cut the hook out of the tree:
 
Step 12: Do the hokey pokey:
 
 
 
Step 13: Call it a day:
 
 
No fish were harmed in this outing.  But plenty were fed.